Thursday, May 14, 2009

Ohhhhhh, Fuuuuuuudge...

Anyone who has seen "A Christmas Story," knows this famous line uttered by Ralphie Parker as his old man smacks the upturned hubcap out of his hands, sending lug nuts flying. We hear him say "fudge," but we all know what he's really saying.

Much like when I went to transfer clothes from the washer to the dryer and saw this...


It may appear the washer is over-loaded with clothing. However, it's an optical illusion because the clothes are, in fact, floating in standing water. And the washer was quiet. Dead quiet. The unmistakable stench of "burned motor" hung in the air. It tried to advance to the next cycle, but all that came out was a click. Then nothing.

I think they call that the "death rattle."

Ordinarily, this would be cause for celebration and I would be doing the "new appliance" dance all the way to Lowe's. However, if you know my life right now, you'd know this is NOT the time for one of the most important household appliances to go belly-up. Not. The. Time.

Who knows, maybe it can be fixed ...? From what I understand, it's only seven years old. But for a machine that's used at least 2-3 times per day, that must be like calculating dog years or something.

If not, then rest in peace, my friend.

I'm the luckiest...

...because I have acquired a second home. A fine, Lincoln Log abode built by the Sam Construction Company.

It even comes with a horse.
And, yes. He is saying, "Naaaaaaaaa(y)" to welcome you to our home.

The garage may be detached, but it comes with a bitchin' red sports car.

I am the luckiest.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

May 12, 2009: Back in the habit

No, I'm not talking about nun fashion.

I can't stand it when I have something come up and miss a day of writing. Because then one day turns into two, then three. Then, before you know it, a whole boat-load of days have gone by in between posts. And I don't even know if anyone regularly reads/cares, except for maybe one or two people who tell me they read this.

I have recently been re-inspired to get back to my writing. And not just here or for my day job. As a self-admitted "word nerd," I love stringing together words and telling stories. Hopefully people find them entertaining ... at least mildly.

Are you with me, people?

So, last night Jack and Charlie had another baseball game. Their team racked up four runs by the 2nd inning. Unfortunately, the other team racked up 17 by the end of the game. Poor kids. I sat in the bleachers, wrapped in a blanket thinking of my motivational speech for the ride home. (Yes, this is springtime in Indiana, folks. It may be 70 during the day, but you still need a blanket out there at night.) Jack hit not only a double, but a triple as well. Charlie struck out twice, then got walked. He was left on third by his brother when he foul-tipped out in his last at bat. Surprisingly, the boys were upbeat and not particularly sour following the ass-whipping loss, and didn't need my speech.

There's another game Saturday afternoon. Let's cross our fingers that they can come out of this slump. If not, I've always got my speech prepared.